Journal?
Journaling, Monsters, and the Messy Truth About Being Me
Let’s be real: journaling and I haven’t always been best mates. I have ADHD, so the idea of sitting down with a beautifully curated notebook, perfectly colour-coded pens, and neatly organised thoughts has often felt like a great idea—right up until it wasn’t. Before I know it, the pressure to “do it right” takes over, and I’m left feeling like a failure before I’ve even started. And don’t get me started on the whole “Insta-worthy” thing. What is Insta-worthy, anyway?
For ages, I believed journaling (and, to be honest, life) had to look a certain way. Like everything needed to be polished, orderly, and tied up with a neat little bow. But here’s the truth: my life isn’t like that. It’s loud, messy, and wonderfully chaotic. My self-care isn’t all lavender candles and perfectly steeped tea; it’s books, cans of fizzy, biscuits, and the occasional nap under a heap of unfolded laundry 🤣
Sometimes, I’m my own worst critic. I get snappy and impatient with myself, especially when things aren’t as “together” as I think they should be. But lately, I’ve been working on giving myself permission—permission to grab anything at hand, a random notebook, use a biro that’s running out of ink, or even just doodle with a crayon. I’ve realised that journaling (and self-care) doesn’t have to be pretty to be powerful.
Take today’s journaling page, for example. It’s messy and unapologetically me. On one side is my monster—bright red, pointy, chaotic, and just a bit terrifying. It’s the part of me that shows up when I’m overwhelmed or frustrated, the part that snaps when things don’t feel good enough. On the other side is my self-care—a soft, fluffy cloud filled with books, sweets, and random comforts. It’s not perfect either, but it’s honest.
This exercise has been a reminder that my monsters aren’t something to fight or suppress; they’re just part of me. And so are my softer, gentler bits. Life doesn’t come wrapped in a bow, and neither do I.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed by the idea of journaling—or life in general—let me tell you this: you don’t have to be perfect. You don’t have to have the right tools, the right timing, or the right anything. Just start. Grab a notebook, a scrap of paper, or the back of an old receipt and write. Draw. Scribble. Do whatever feels right.
If you’re reading this, I’d love for you to join me in this journaling challenge. Use any page, any pen, and start wherever you are—Thursday, halfway through the month, whenever. Let’s let go of the idea that we have to wait for the “right time” or the “right tools.” Just start.
What does your monster look like? How do you show it some love? You don’t have to share, but if you do, I’d love to hear about it. Let’s be messy, real, and gloriously imperfect together.
Take gentle care,
Louise x
